It's not my fault, I didn't know!"  Seriously?

Sally has been living with Chris for the past five years in a small town house in the suburbs of Boston.  Two years and a half ago, Sally called me after a night of partying with friends at her home.  She sounded disturbed.  She had caught Chris snorting cocaine in the bathroom, and she told me that she had absolutely no clue that he was an occasional drug user.  A couple of months later, she rang me again, this time to share with me her disgust of coming home from work much earlier than usual, to find him masturbate to a male gay porn DVD in their bedroom.  For an hour, she sustained that she was billions of miles away from thinking, even for a split second, that he would be turned on by that. 
She phoned me while we were still in Europe last September to share with us the best thing that could have ever happened to her: She was pregnant, and she and Chris were going to be parents. She had missed her period once, and had concluded that it was it.  Having forgotten about his cocaine consumption and his interest for gay porn, she asked him to marry her.  So they rushed to the court house where the judge married them.  Two weeks later, she had a miscarriage, and, enraged about her failure to have a child, Chris started beating her. 
The trick is that in the state of Massachusetts, annulment is not that easy to obtain, unless you married your brother or you are underage.
I swear, I didn't know!  Everything was so perfect!
Perfect.  How many red flags popped up right before her eyes on the night she saw him doing drugs?  As a starter.

Marcy and Rick were forced to sell the house of their dreams right on the beach in Manhattan Beach, and downscale to a one-bedroom condominium in the Valley.
When Internet stocks became hot commodities in the nineties, Marcy undertook the mission to make it big on the NASDAQ and other markets.  She had quit her Marketing job to become a full-time at-home investor.  Rick thought it was a great idea that would enable them to generate huge amounts of money quickly.  They re-financed their house twice, and, each time, used the extra money to feed the margin accounts Marcy had opened with a couple of online brokerage firms.
The problem is that markets started to crash early 2001, and all the profits she had accumulated quickly vanished, only to leave room to six millions dollars of debt.  When the bubble busted, so did all their savings and all their capital.  
Rick called me crying and screaming, "I lost everything!  What are we going to do?  I didn't know it was so bad!"
I asked him, "Rick, during all these years, did you fucking ask your wife about what she was up to?"
He had never asked her anything, hoping that she would still be able to manager despite crashing financial markets.

After reading those lines, I dare you to ever say again, "I did not know!"

grace@readytochoose.com
nicolas@readytochoose.com
Main: +1.650.488.4574
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Y!IM: readytochoose
www.readytochoose.com

Grace and Nicolas Roquefort-Villeneuve are the founders of READY TO CHOOSE LLC. They give private sessions and workshops worldwide not only but mostly on Sex & Relationships, incorporating Access tools to unconventional techniques of empowerment. They also are the host of their own very popular weekly live Internet radio show on BlogTalk Radio, named Toast, Jam & Relationships! They wrote Create A Conscious Relationship To Create So Much More For Your Life to answer a demand from their clients. The book is based on their experience helping individuals and couples to create a different kind of relationship for themselves. Their classes, private sessions, blog posts, radio shows, and book are life changing.